cydling: (fft: delita)
hecatesbrat ([personal profile] cydling) wrote in [community profile] finalfantasy2013-01-04 12:56 am
Entry tags:

Fanfic: Means To An End (Final Fantasy Tactics)

Title: Means To An End
Author: [personal profile] cydling/ LJ user: gargoule
Fandom: Final Fantasy Tactics
Rating: PG-13
On Going (WIP)/One-off/Series: One off
Classification(s): POV, Short Fic, Possible Deathfic
Warnings: Angst, Spoilers, Possible Suicidal Theme,
Pairing(s): Delita Heiral/Ovelia Atkascha
Word Count: 612
Author's Notes: This is my ideas/thoughts/written bits in regards to Princess Ovelia's side of things upto just the end of Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions. It's also my very first time writing for Tactics, which is heady and intense.
My apologies to the cross posting.
Summary: Ovelia's thoughts on being a pawn during the war and probably a goodly part of her life.




During our travels he spoke of such things as creating a world for me but like many others in my life, he holds power and I grow weary of those in power. The mistrust I hold for them must border on being flagrantly obvious at times, of this I am certain.

My mind slips back to other travels I partook of with the now heretic, Ramza Beoulve, and my childhood companion Agrais. I felt lighter then, or perhaps, it was because I was able to speak candidly about my childhood with Agrais. Darker moments threaded its way through that conversation but it is one I look on with a light hearted fondness. Ser Ramza appeared to hold back speech and a sadness touched his eyes when he let his gaze sit upon me, even though he was able to better instruct me upon Alma's teachings of the grass blade whistle. My grass whistle was never as good as Ramza's, or Delita's.

Once more, Delita's words worm their way into my most inner thoughts and I stifle a sigh. Everything with him has been a whirlwind as though I am a child's spinning toy and I can only spin, and spin, and spin. Does he even see the full extent of his actions, or the consequences that might be dealt? Does he even see me for who I am?

There is no comfort for me here with him, nor in the words he speaks. Not anymore. Once more, my place is as a pawn on a board and oh how I loathe it. Anger and bitterness boil within my belly; anger at being used as a pawn, bitterness because this seems to be forever the life I must lead.

Am I to be forever shackled and caged? To be passed like currency tween men's hands for their own ends? Circumscribed among priests within their dark stoned monasteries, looking through windows unto the blue skies I could never reach until a time comes that I can serve some purpose for a man and to find myself caged yet again. Regent's hands had tried their mightiest to deal my death in shadows that reached like Lucavi demon's claws. Death dealers and puppet masters pulled at unseen strings; this was the way of a token princess.

Delita's words were once a honeyed balm to mine ears, a seeming light at the end of a darkened tunnel path. Words that buoyed me and lifted spirits so loftily. But how quick they are to become ash, how quick the wind blew to expose the barren and ugly truth. There was no truth there for me. For him, in his eyes and goals, I served him well. Elevated his status, help craft an obtainable world where his plans and devices could be executed. Only in my world would stone walls and a wedding band both be a shackle and a symbol of uselessness.

A false princess made into a false Queen, is still a figurehead of power, of a throne, of a country. A cornered pawn, tis all I am to the world. Honeyed words that held lies but never love or respect. One can never really love a tool, can they, as there is no reason for it.

I tire now of all of this: of promises of a kingdom worthy of me; of a world where my apparent light outshines the sun and that does not know darkness. No more of this weighty game nor bandied lies. I will partake no more. No longer will the earth be bathed by my bitter tears, no more will I bemoan my fate. By my hand, I will end this.
sidonie: (Default)

[personal profile] sidonie 2013-01-05 05:26 am (UTC)(link)
I'm glad you found the courage to post this, because it is wonderful. And I'm so happy you took on Ovelia's point of view - she's a fascinating character and so difficult to write, and you convey her character perfectly here. There's such a sense of bitterness and betrayal, but also more than a little idealism and yearning for freedom - it really brings home the tragedy of her story in the game, and I love how you have her making the decision at the end to be no longer a pawn. There are several lines where the formality of her inner narration is both lovely and works very well in establishing her mood, but overall, this is my probably favorite: Delita's words were once a honeyed balm to mine ears, a seeming light at the end of a darkened tunnel path. Words that buoyed me and lifted spirits so loftily. But how quick they are to become ash, how quick the wind blew to expose the barren and ugly truth. There was no truth there for me.

I do have some quick grammatical corrections, if you're interested - If so, just let me know. With that said, I really loved reading this, and I hope you will be posting more Tactics fic in the future!
sidonie: (Default)

[personal profile] sidonie 2013-01-05 06:04 am (UTC)(link)
It was totally unbeta'ed. I wanted to get it out there and off my plate, other wise it might not have seen the light of day for another week or so-ish? - I definitely understand the feeling there.

As for the corrections, it's pretty minor stuff, really:

Darker moments threaded its way should be Darker moments threaded their way, Elevated his status, help craft should be Elevated his status, helped craft, One can never really love a tool, can they, as there is no reason for it. should end with a question mark, and it is unclear what the word 'that' in this sentence refers to: of a world where my apparent light outshines the sun and that does not know darkness.. (I think it refers to a world that does not know darkness, but I think the sentence could be rearranged a bit to make that clearer immediately).

But yes, your Ovelia is definitely IC here - and I actually forgot to mention this before, but I really loved the detail with Delita and the blade of grass whistle. It hearkens back to a more innocent side of him in a wonderfully bittersweet fashion.